Are You A Winner Or A Loser?

He never realized before how lonely it could feel in the stadium
filled with hundreds of spectators.

Yet this defeat that came to him so suddenly and terribly made
him almost want to cry.

His string of victories had come to a crashing end. He had won
three Olympic gold medals and had not been defeated in 13 years.

Rulon Gardner, his young rival, was surrounded by flashlights
and people.

Yet here he was, the great Karelin, universally considered the
greatest Greco-Roman wrestler of all time, feeling utterly
alone. What should have been another great moment in his life
was now one of the worst. Someone who had never won a major
title had defeated him utterly.

It was a match that no one thought he could lose. He overheard
the buoyant young American saying, "When did I think I could
beat him? About 10 minutes ago. I kept saying, 'I think I can. I
think I can.' But it wasn't until it was over that I knew I
could." Alexander had never conceded a point in 10 years. Today,
he had lost 1-0. He caught the confused look on the face of IOC
president, Juan Antonio Samaranch, and quickly looked away.
Later that evening, wandering alone in the Olympic village, he
ran into his friend Boris Spassky, a former world chess
champion.

They spoke, and he tried to express his pain to his friend.

Finally, after much thought, his eyes looking into the distance,
Boris said, "Somehow you have to look beyond the sights. Somehow
you have to hear between the words. Somehow you have to close
the gap between your heart and your mind."

"I don't understand," said Alexander.

"You think that you have been defeated. That you will never
again be the King. But look where you are. You are in the same
universe. And just as it conspired to give you glory, so too it
will continue to unroll its miracles. You will win again. All
you have to do is trust, once again, in magic."

"What magic? Is this about superstition?"

"The magic of yourself in space and time. The magic of being
here now. Trust in it. What seems hopeless will be transmuted.
What seems lost will be found again."

"Am I a loser?" asked Alexander abruptly, the agony of the day
breaking through him.

"If you have a little time, we can talk about what it means to
win and lose. It is important that we do it."

"Yes, let's do it."

Since it was getting chilly, they wandered back to the Olympic
village and settled on the cafeteria as a place to continue
their discussion.

After they had filled up their trays, they found a secluded
corner, away from the other athletes, some of whom were proudly
wearing their medallions on their chest.

"I know how you feel because I have been in your situation,"
said Boris. When I was World Champion, the best player in the
world, the world thought that I was a winner. When I played
Bobby Fischer at the World Championship at Reykjavik in 1972, I
lost. The world then decided that I was a loser."

Alexander frowned. "So, what are you?" he asked.

"I am what I am."

"Hunh?"

"First of all, winning and losing are not my identity. They are
an expression of what I do. It is important to make this
distinction. Then one can have some clarity.

"Winning and losing, ultimately, are not events but mindsets.

"Most people think that they are events. But when you look
closely at something, you can see that many things decide
whether an outcome will be favorable or not.

"There have been people who have been on a winning streak for
years, and then the tide appears to turn and they appear to have
lost the magic.

"Then there are others who appear to have never won at anything,
but then suddenly appear to hit a winning streak."

"This is quite confusing," said Alexander. He would much rather
be grunting over some barbells then wrestling with philosophy.

"It is confusing because life is not predictable. A person can
become highly skilled at something and be winning at life when
the rules unexpectedly change and their skills become obsolete.
For example, when the computer revolution happened, highly
skilled printing compositors found themselves out of work."

Alexander nodded. "All of a sudden, you are no longer the best
at what you do."

"Similarly, internal physiological factors can result in a major
loss. It is said that Napoleon lost at Waterloo because he had a
bad case of exhaustion and diarrhea at the time. The most
brilliant military strategist the world had ever known was
outmaneuvered and decisively defeated by the Duke of Wellington.
Napoleon then spent the rest of his days in exile on St Helena."

"What is one to make of all this?" asked Alexander in
exasperation.

"It is for this reason that I say that we can only hope at all
times to do our best, but what happens is sometimes outside our
personal influence." "An original countermove by our opponent
throws away the value of everything we know," said Alexander
bitterly, talking more to himself than responding to his friend.

"So," continued Boris, "we have to rely on three things:
attitude, responsibility, and willingness to learn. If we do
this, then we can create more favorable outcomes for ourselves."

"I'm not too sure about that," said Boris.

"It is as easy as falling off a log to be cynical, but hope and
optimism take effort. A winner will focus on what can be done.
And a loser will focus on what cannot be done and the reasons
why. Attitude is essential. Before a competition, you must be
convinced in your own mind that you will win. A loser will say
that this is not realistic or sensible. Yet realism and
rationality are not what create victory. It is raw passion and
the willingness to do your best."

"How can one have the right attitude after one has just lost?"
asked Alexander.

"Your attitude determines your future. When you let a bitter
experience cast its shadow over your future, you have lost
before beginning. Instead refuse to accept setbacks as a a
prediction of your possibilities. 'I can do it,' is the attitude
of a winner. Winners become losers when they let a loss defeat
their attitude."

For the first time that evening, Alexander smiled. "When a
winner loses their winning attitude that is when they're losing
streak begins. I can't let my past condition my future. Only my
will and my desire should be responsible for it. "

"Speaking of responsibility," continued Boris, "you have to be
responsible for resuming your training tomorrow. Instead of
wallowing in defeat, you can exult in your next victory over
your opponents. The ability to respond positively is the next
step of victory."

"What else?" asked Alexander.

"You have to always be willingness to learn. The only real
difference between people is depth of knowledge. It is the
distinction that separates the winners from the losers. The
winners know what to do while losers are clueless. Yet knowledge
is never static; there is always more to learn, more techniques
to study, more skills to refine. The minute you stop willing to
learn new things is when you start to lose."

A long silence followed.

Finally, Alexander spoke. "I believe I have understood you. To
be a winner, we have to rely on three things: attitude,
responsibility, and willingness to learn. If we do this, then we
can create more favorable outcomes for ourselves."

As if raising his queen off the board to complete a checkmate,
Boris asked, "Are you a winner or a loser, Alexander Karelin?"

"I am a winner!" said Alexander, unconsciously twisting the
steel fork in his massive hand into a pretzel.